I am developing a true love/hate relationship with social media. When I first discovered Facebook it was love at first sight. I battled to keep myself off FB and I would post anything. I wouldn’t hesitate to post a picture or update my status. I loved reconecting with old friends and  checking in to see what they had been up to.

These days I am loosing my enthuisiasm. Some days I absolutely hate Facebook and other days I love it. I find myself asking, ‘Why exactly do I need Facebook?’ My relationship with this social media tool has definaetly changed and I have felt it most since Jayden arrived. I must admit that sometimes I forget who I am talking to and I forget that I have friends on FB that I would rather exclude from the conversation.  I feel like I need to be a little more private and less out there, but I am not sure where that feeling comes from. I am finding that I have to reevaluate what I use Facebook for and therefore adapt what I share and how I share it.

So what do I use Facebook for?

To catch up with old friends? I have a couple of friends that I went to high school with who have imagrated and have children. Its great to see pics of thier kids growing up, and to share pictures of Jayden. These are the types of friends that know about my life. They know my story and they would be welcome in my house anytime. So am I comfortable sharing with them…absolutely yes! But, I can just as easily do that on e-mail and skype……

To catch up with current friends? I must admit that I do enjoy the ‘Jonny did this today’ update. Life is so busy and as much as I hate to admit it, it is nice to have a platform to share these things. But what happened to actually seeing each other and spending time together. If FB didn’t exist how would we get to know these things? Did we miss out on all of this in the past? Or are some FB friendships just superficial? I’ll ‘like’ your photo and comment on your status and you can do the same, but please don’t phone me or come to my house because I don’t know you THAT well.

To organise an event? Yip, its a nifty little tool, but once again it can be done by e-mail.

To share photos? I am so proud of my son and I love to share photos of him on Facebook, but sometimes I wonder if it is really necesary. I am sure that some people really don’t care and in that case why would I want to share his gorgeousness with them.

To Lurk? Some of my facebook friends are purely aquiantances. It’s nice to see what they are up to but sometimes I wonder if I am really worthy enough of having access to all thier photos and updates. These types of friends never comment on my status and I never comment on thiers. We simply aren’t close enough to make an appropriate comment. And so I ask, is it ok to look through each others photos and fill in the blanks about thier personal life. I supose it is human nature, but do I really want these people making assumptions about my life? Maybe I shouldn’t care???

Is Facebook really about friends? Was it ever really about friends? Or has it morphed into a some sort of personal branding tool. I supose it depends on who the bulk of your facebook friends are and how you decide to use it. I find it really hard to believe that Facebook is about the real you? If it was we would see more real life status updates like;

“I am having a huge fight with my husband” OR “Today I am finding it difficult to be a mother”

Instead we get ambiguios status updates like;

“Life is so unfair” OR simply “Today, I hate you.”

I’m not saying that I’m not guilty of doing these things. In fact I have done all of the above. It has just made me wonder what I really need facebook for and I am reevaluating how I present myself.

Maybe I need a break from facebook so I can really think about what I use it for…….

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