I know that these types of posts can be annoying to those still battling with infertility. I know that if I was having a bad day they did little to soothe my soul, which is ultimatley the intention. So please click away if this is not your cup of tea, but if your in the mood ……enjoy!!!


January 2011– One of my closest friends tells me she is pregnant with her third child. I’m angry and frustrated with the universe and life.

Little did I know that our son had been concieved.


February 2011 – Our family get together to celebrate my grans 80th birthday. I release six balloons into the air as a symbol of letting go of the pain of five failed IVF’s and one chemical pregnancy.

Little did I know that I would be a mother in six months time.


June 2011 – A fellow bridesmaid anounces her pregnancy. I am really happy that she didn’t battled to concieve, but I still feel the sting of being left behind again.

Little did I know that I would have our son in my arms before she greeted her daughter.


July 2011 – I’m battling and I’m losing hope.

Little did I know that our beautiful birth mom had contacted our Social Worker and was looking at our profile.


Late August 2011 – I make the monthly call to our SW to tell her that I’ll be away on Zambia on a business trip.

Little did I know that our birth mother was seriously considering choosing our profile.


13 September, 2011 – My best friends baby is born. I am so glad that everything has gone well. I wonder when it will finally be my turn

Little did I know that in one week I would get ‘the call’ telling me that I was going to be a mom in 4 DAYS time.


I will never forget how dark my pre Jayden days were….never.

Sometimes when we are in our darkest times, the light is just around the corner.