Sometimes I forget about how difficult this is for my husband. I forget that I have been open to adoption for a long time. I forget that I have worked through my feelings about genetics through using donor eggs and he is only dealing with this concept now. Sometimes I feel guilty that he married me and he now has to face these decisions. Even though he has told me over and over that he would choose me again and again. I know he will be ok, but sometimes I forget that he is not in exactly the same place I am. The hurt is still deep and raw.
I know that when he sees our baby he will fall in love and his hurt will be softened. I need to remember to be easy on him and not dismiss his feelings. I need to remember that he is still allowed to be sad and angry. I need to remember that this didn’t just happen to me.