On Saturday night we had friends over for dinner. We got chatting after we had eaten and the subject of babies came up. So my friends husband feels the need to declare “I don’t want kids, I just don’t have the time in my life. I am way too busy”
Okay, now I am not judging him for saying that AT ALL. Because it is his choice …..and not everyone needs to want a child with the desire I have for one. Everyone is different. But it did spark a debate in my head.
My first reaction was WHY? Why wouldn’t you want a child? So I decided to examine the reason’s why people have children. I suppose everyone has thier own specific reasons, but I think a few ‘shared’ reasons are;
- Because you love your partner so much that you want to create something together that only the two of you can create.
- Some say it is instinct.
- Some say it is what society expects from you.
- Maybe it is because you want to pass on your genes, or carry on the family name.
So I ask myself, Why do I want a child. Okay reason number one does not apply anymore due to my skrambled eggs and neither does reason number four. Maybe it is instinct and maybe society has put the idea into my head. I don’t know if it is me…..but I think reason 2 and 3 are pretty shallow reasons if they are viewed in isolation. So where does that leave me………..
It leaves me wanting to have more than just a child. I want to have a family. Family is not about DNA or eye colour or height. It is not about mannerisms or intelligence or ‘the way you walk’. Family is about love and sharing and growing and learning.